Louise Lague, MA NCC /
The Transitions of Midlife
Portland, OR 97201
ph: 503-539-7650
louisela
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National Certified Counselor
Specializing in Midlife Issues
Mission: My mission in life is simple: I hate to see people worry about things that night never happen. Or even about things that are likely to happen. There are always other ways to deal with stressors other than getting anxious. It's the easiest thing in the world to be worried; my mission is to teach you the step-by-step skills to banish worry.
A professional counselor does not tell a client what to do, but like a consultant, points out other possibilities that might work better.
For example, we all have individual methods and attitudes that we used to survive as children. Many of those are now working against us, but because we have always held them, it is hard to identify them. A counselor can help with that.
That feeling of being stuck can be triggered by certain predictable adult events.
Events that typically get us stuck:
- Divorce
- Care of elderly parents
- Adult orphanhood
- Empty nest
- Disillusionment or dismissal at work
- Relationship problems
- Loneliness
- Lack of motivation
These are normal, but difficult areas of adult life. In most cases, I can have you feeling better about life in one session, and reinforce and solidify well-being in a few subsequent visits. You are meant to be a self-forgiving, fulfilled, authentic, and joyous person. That is within reach.
New: Distance Counseling
Did you know it is possible to get counseling via telephone and email? I'm now accepting clients from around the world. The rate is the same, with some adjustments for long distance phone rates where applicable.
Location, Location, Location:
My office is now in downtown Portland, Ore. at 1130 SW Morrison, Suite 238. It's right on both the MAX line and the streetcar line. Parking is easy as well. Call me for an appointment at 503-539-7650.
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Thoughts for June
The Uses of Scar Tissue
"She just doesn't have the experience. Not enough scar tissue."
This is one executive talking about another in the business page of the New York Times. It doesn't matter who was talking about whom, nor do I remember, but I was struck by the use of the words "scar tissue."
Scar tissue, emotional scar tissue, is exactly what we get when we've seen enough of adult life. Where there was a wound, there is now an ugly lump. But this lump is tough. It resists re-injury. It is stronger than the skin that was there before.
Obviously, our physical bodies hasten to heal and cover up wounds, even throwing on a bunch of extra skin cells to protect this vulnerable spot.
Our emotions do not work quite so automatically. What our minds want to do is take a lesson from whatever caused the wound (such as getting fired or divorced") and then move on, harboring only happy memories and then trying different solutions besides the one that hurt.
But we know what happens when we keep picking at a scab. It bleeds on. The thinking attached to emotional scab-picking sounds like this: "Why me? Life isnt fair! I've been victimized again!" And we've all been there.
If we stay too long there, picking away and moaning, the scar can't heal. We can't get that layer of extra tough skin that keeps us from making that same mistake again. Or from remembering the pain.
(Continued on Psychoblog page)
Copyright Louise Lague, MA NCC, 2007 All rights reserved.
Portland, OR 97201
ph: 503-539-7650
louisela
